THINGS I NO LONGER DO THANKS TO FINANCIAL FREEDOM!

You’re bleary-eyed, weary and it’s 6am on Monday morning. You are precariously perched atop a befouled toilet seat at the Phoenix Sky Harbor airport. You are attempting to breathe through your mouth lest you asphyxiate on the rank miasma of flatulence that masquerades as air in here. Your expensive designer shoes are slowly, sadly yielding to the sea of urine that makes up the so-called floor. You have been up since 3am to get your first flight here from LA and your connecting flight boards in 9 minutes so you can get to your job 4 time zones away. As you stifle a gag, you say to yourself, “When I’m financially free, I swear I will NEVER, EVER…EVER have do this again.”

WHAT ARE YOU NOT GOING TO DO?

If your experience was similar to mine, when you mention your FIRE aspirations to others, one of the questions you, invariably, get is, “So, what are you going to do?” I always found this question to be a bit odd as it subtly suggests that one would, somehow, find it a seemingly Herculean challenge to replace the 50+ hours a week usually spent working with something else – anything else. Nevertheless, my simple, but genuine retort was always the same, “You are asking the wrong question. The real question you should be asking is, ‘What am I not going to do?’”

Financial independence and freedom, in general, are all about choice. They are as much about not doing things as they are about relentlessly pursuing all we are impassioned by. In my case, it was unceremoniously dumping a bunch of unsavory things directly associated with my prior career. While I enjoyed my job, it came bundled with a bunch of crap I really didn’t. As I endured these tribulations for decades, I never complained (well, not too much anyway) as I was keenly aware that it was a part of the life I had chosen to carve my path to financial independence. It was entirely volitional. As the adage goes, “the shit you have to climb through is the shit you choose to take.”

ALL THAT YOU CAN LEAVE BEHIND

However, before we embark on our journey of exploring the magic of financial independence, we’ve got to get ourselves out from under all this stifling mundanity – all this shit. So, let’s take a moment to unburden ourselves a bit and leave some of this junk at the door. To misquote the lads in U2, let’s talk about “all the things we can leave behind.”

So, without further ado, here are a few of the things that I no longer have to do (thankfully)! Let’s all bid “Farewell” to these as we say “Hello” to financial freedom.

CORPORATE SPEAK

While many of us are, to greater or lesser extents, guilty of this (I sure was), the pervasive use of “corporate-speak” and “non-words” over the past decade is staggering and, frankly, exhausting. Listening to ostensibly educated people utter ridiculous sentences devoid of any meaning like, “Let’s all circle back after this meeting to get on point and schedule a robust deep-dive to size-up the body of work” is just revolting. This is number one on this list for a reason.

COSTUMES

They say clothes makes the man, but that is very rarely true. Just like “good feathers don’t necessarily make a good bird.” That said, I enjoying wearing a wide-variety of clothing ranging from the ultra-casual of board shorts and a T-shirt to a great looking, killer fitting suit. However, what I abhor is being forced to purchase, launder and wear a fucking costume. And let’s be honest here, that’s what having to dress in “business attire” really is – a costume. It may be worn by hundreds of millions of people every day, but that is, indeed, precisely what it is. And a boring, tired, one at that. Now I have the freedom to dress like Mr. Fate 24/7 even if that means an old, ripped-up Devo shirt sometimes.

THE STINK OF FEAR

If you’ve ever spent even a modicum of time in a corporate environment, you likely have noticed a particularly curious and very common odor wafting gently about the office. This odor actually has a name. Its name is “The Stink of Fear” and the higher you go up the organizational chart, the more potent is becomes. In boardrooms, it’s nearly suffocating. “The Stink of Fear” is exactly that – the odoriferous personification of people acting, behaving, and making decisions on fear – specifically, the fear of losing one’s place in the social hierarchy, losing power and, most importantly, losing one’s job. While some remain immune, most do not. Watching people make horrible decisions that adversely affect others, behave abominably, serve only themselves, and in some cases, abandon their own personal beliefs and values, as a result of fear. is profoundly saddening.

INCESSANT TRAVEL

For over five years, the longest I ever spent in a single time zone was thirteen days. Yes, thirteen days. When people inquired about the intrigue and glamour of my “executive lifestyle,” I would always start with this factoid. Not shockingly, I don’t think most even believed it was true. In fact, it was and it is something that I will never, EVER miss. Living one’s life consistently being in a minimum of three time-zones each week is, let’s face it, not really living one’s life. Our bodies are strong, adaptable and resilient, but they are no match to the standard “lifestyle career.” Over time it imperceptibly erodes your body, mind and spirit. There is a reason why, by law, airline pilots cannot fly more than 100 hours per month and this is it.

WAKING UP SCREAMING

There is a very specific reason why all major global hotel chains strive for homogeneity with the design and look of their rooms. The reason is that frequent guests can always expect, and count on, the same thing at each property. Whether it’s the service at the front desk or knowing where the hair dryer is located or how to work the thermostat, frequent travelers embrace this, as they should – the predictability of the experience and the physical environment is assuring. However, the attribute of consistency also has a more insidious side. Because each room is exactly the same, it also means you can never be entirely certain as to exactly where you are. While I’ve tried to plumb the depths for some humor on this one, waking up screaming from a nightmare and having no idea whatsoever where you – every single week – is an almost unfathomable level of terror.

ELECTRONIC SLAVERY

While I assert that technology has been, generally, a boon for us humans, it does have rather wily underbelly, particularly in the context of the workaday world. Yes, things like laptops, smartphones, private networks, and video technology give people infinitely more ways to communicate and work efficiently with near limitless convenience. However, many productivity-obsessed companies quickly cottoned on to the “always connectedness” of their employees and now use it as a perverse form of electronic servitude that transcends the basic, normalized workweek and now consumes our precious evenings and weekends. In its most egregious form, people are expected to be perpetually available. With boundaries evaporating and technology accelerating, people are now trading more and more of their time to work for the same amount of money. Sadly, because of “The Stink of Fear,” there is little recourse available once an employer snares you..

SEAS OF URINE

Without question, the thing I was most delighted to leave behind and, not coincidentally, is the most repulsive and vile of them all – having to use overcrowded, unclean airport restrooms. No longer do I suffer and nearly asphyxiate on the rank miasma composed of the flatulence and defecation of a thousand other businessmen. No longer do I have to slip and slide on the veritable seas of urine inexplicably awash on the floor of every restroom in every airport in every location on the planet. So much goddamned urine! And for that, I am eternally grateful.

ESCHEW MUNDANITY & EMBRACE MAGIC

I’m so grateful that all of these are no longer a part of the new life I’ve chosen, courtesy of financial freedom. Yeah, it may read a tad rant-like in places, but this part of the journey is all about abandoning things we don’t want to pursue the things we do. About the choices we have as a result of financial independence and freedom. About eschewing mundanity and embracing magic.

In conclusion, If you’re ever in doubt of your FIRE aspirations, DON’T BE! Keep at it and it will be worth it – I promise. Even if you only considered the things you won’t do as a result of FI, that’s reason enough. When you factor in the magic we’re about to explore next – it’s the journey of a lifetime.

Hopefully, you got a sly chuckle as I’m certain you can relate to some of these. What are some of the things you have left or can’t wait to leave behind on your journey to financial independence. I’d enjoy hearing from you, so be sure to chime in below in the comments.